It has been over a month since my last post. That is just way too long. Things deteriorated after the youngest moved out and I fully faced the empty house for the first time. I hadn’t realized how much having someone around somewhere else in the house was keeping me anchored. A lot of peripheral things started coming unglued at the same time, and I got to a pretty dark space. Barbara always said she hated March, and this year I was inclined to agree with her. April didn’t start out much better, either.
It has been hard wrestling with the decision on the house. My dad came up a few times when I was at the really rough patch and helped me get started on packing and sorting out the dining room. That got me going enough to finally start tackling the drywall and paint issues on my own. I still don’t get enough done in a day, but my head is finally clearing again.
Last week my daughters and the grand-kids came out, and the girls were a big help going through all the craft materials in the attic. We had a bunch of friends over, mostly the needle-workers who used to meet here once a month, and they took some of the excess. It’s nice to know her friends will be making projects with some of the stuff she didn’t get a chance to use. There is still a huge amount of books and supplies left to donate, but I’m starting to find homes for it all.
The best part of all of last week was simply having a full house again, if even for a little while. This place was designed to be full of people. One way or the other that has to happen again.
I am now coming up on the run of time that I have been dreading since I first looked at this unexpected road ahead of me. Despite this winter’s best efforts to extend forever, spring is finally upon us.
Tuesday is Barbara’s 50th birthday. We met on her nineteenth. Three weeks later is our 30th wedding anniversary. In between is Mother’s Day. All of the big anniversaries all piled together. This is the gauntlet I knew I would have to run.
But I won’t have to run it alone. Barbara and I started our journey together surrounded by unexpected friends in an unexpected place, and this year I will mark the anniversary in much the same way. More on that later.